Don't you get sick of hearing it?
"You'd be so pretty if you lost weight."
You know what? I'm already pretty. Prettier than your hateful ass.
The question is am I happy?
The answer in the grand sense is a resounding YES! I have two beautiful daughters and an amazing husband. I have a nice home, a nice car, a big screen tv, an Iphone - the works. The only thing I don't like about my life - is ME.
I dont fit.
I'm fat, currently. I have binged and starved, yoyoed up and down since I went on my first diet at age nine. Have you ever seen "Monster's Ball"? You know the scene where Halle Berry slaps her son around and calls him a fat-ass? He manages to make it through the incident to go to the sanctuary of his room to eat a candy bar from his secret stash. It pissed me off. "That never works by the way." I said to my husband. "You can't berate someone into good behavior."
BING!
That's when it hit me, my internal dialogue is no better. I'm very harsh and judgemental, hateful with myself. So I refuse to beat myself up anymore. This is my first step to a healthy weight and possibly even a healthy relationship with food. So this blog is here. It's here to give or get advice, for a shoulder to cry on, for updates, for a place to unload everything you cant say to your Mom or your Spouse or even to yourself. It's also here to make me accountable in a real way to someone besides myself.
So questions, comments, concerns, post 'em here.
And remember - you cant not eat.
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Women, Food, and God...think this is a book you and I both need to check out! Blogging is the new age journal and support group...let the healing begin!
ReplyDeleteWell said, Kendra! I beat myself up every day because I don't have the body I had before having a baby. Even though I am smaller than I was back then. Makes no damn sense. Here's to a healthy support system.
ReplyDeleteI think a good rule of thumb is: If u wouldn't say it too your kids, you shouldn't say it to yourself.
ReplyDeleteWhat an amazing way to think of things. I can beat myself up (and do) like nobody's business...but if I ever heard someone say some of the things I say to myself to my children...have mercy!!
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